


you're the one (and the two, and the three)

by clownrooster



Category: Todd and the Book of Pure Evil
Genre: Bisexuality, Dubious Consent, F/F, F/M, Foursome - F/F/M/M, Lingerie, M/M, Multi, Oral Sex, Pegging, Polyamory, Porn With Plot, Post-Canon, Recreational Drug Use, Roleplay, Sexual Roleplay, Sexual exploration, boys in lingerie, i promise this fic is actually really wholesome, roleplaying as your best friends during sex, the dubious consent happens in a dream though
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-04
Updated: 2021-01-08
Packaged: 2021-03-10 04:34:16
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 14,343
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27868453
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/clownrooster/pseuds/clownrooster
Summary: Maybe it’s just the simple fact that Todd is hot. And the fact that Curtis thinks that Todd’s hot is hot. And the fact that Curtis wants to call HannahToddwhile they fuck is hot.What? She’s allowed to be horny, too.
Relationships: Curtis Weaver/Hannah B. Williams, Curtis Weaver/Hannah B. Williams/Jenny Kolinsky/Todd Smith, Curtis Weaver/Todd Smith, Hannah B. Williams/Jenny Kolinsky, Jenny Kolinsky/Todd Smith
Kudos: 1





	1. Hannah

**Author's Note:**

> I can't believe how few fics there are for this fandom... It deserves more.
> 
> (Set shortly after _The End of the End_.)

It’s been six weeks since Hannah (just plain Hannah, not Hannah B, not Hannah E, just Hannah) has been The Hannah. The only Hannah. The real Hannah, if that means anything anymore.

And she’s spent most of the last six weeks taking full advantage of Real Hannah’s very real, very nice vagina.

Sure, they’ve had book stuff to deal with. There’s always Book Stuff, capital B, capital S. But whenever they’re not doing Book Stuff, or Gang Stuff (usually initiated by Atticus, who has sort of become their weird mascot slash chaperone), Hannah has been here, in her bed, with Curtis, exploring her very real vagina.

(Did Hannah B have a vagina? She thinks so, but then again, she’s not really sure what to think anymore. She has such clear memories of her parents tucking little Hannah into this exact bed every night, reading her science textbooks like bedtime stories, kissing her on the forehead before shutting off the lights, leaving her with just the glow of her rocket-ship shaped nightlight… Was any of that real, though? And if it was, who did it happen to? Hannah B? Hannah A? What about Hannah C? What happened to her? There are so many things Hannah still doesn’t know. Mostly, it’s easier not to think about it.)

Right now, they’re not doing any vagina exploring, but they are curled up in Hannah’s bed, only half-clothed, watching some horror movie that Curtis picked out on her shitty old laptop. She’s not really paying attention to it. She actually used to like horror movies (or at least, Hannah B did) but they’re kind of boring now. When your everyday life is as gory as theirs is, horror movies kind of lose their appeal.

What she _is_ paying attention to is Curtis. He’s shirtless, in his boxers, her old pink comforter thrown loosely over his lap. He’s watching the horror movie vaguely, his eyes half-lidded, clearly on the verge of falling asleep. It’s late. The view outside her bedroom window is dark and starry, and they’ve already had a busy day of book chasing and vagina exploring.

But Hannah has found it hard to sleep, lately. She still has so much racing around in her mind, even six weeks after… everything.

In some ways, Hannah feels so very different from her clones. She can _feel_ the difference, in a nebulous sort of way. (The lack of evil, she supposes.) But she can still remember all of her clones’ memories in vivid detail, everything they did and said and heard.

A lot of those memories are less than pleasant. (All the evil and attempted murder is… not great.) But some of it is just… intriguing.

She remembers making out with Todd, for example. And, maybe even more than that, she remembers what Curtis said to her _after_ she made out with Todd.

_As much as it hurts me that you made out with Todd, it’s not like it isn’t something I haven’t dreamed about doing… again._

For some reason, Hannah can’t get those words out of her head. She can’t get the _image_ that those words conjure out of her head. Hannah’s not stupid—it’s not like she hadn’t noticed, before, the way Curtis looks at Todd. How enamored he is with his best friend. How—okay— _horny_ he is for his best friend.

Hell, she _saw_ him make out with Todd once, but that was Book Stuff. This is… real stuff.

“Curtis?” she says softly, running her hand up his bare chest.

“Hmm?” he mumbles, blinking out of his half-asleep stupor.

“How often do you think about kissing Todd?”

He turns slightly to stare down at her, where she’s curled up against his side. She looks up to meet his eyes, propping her chin against his right shoulder.

“What?” he says.

“You told me you dream about making out with him. You know. Back when I… made out with him.”

“You didn’t make out with him,” Curtis says quickly. “Hannah D did. Or was that Hannah E? I lost track at some point.”

“Sure, sure,” she says, waving her hand as if she can wave away his protests. She keeps telling him— _all those Hannahs are still me, it’s all me_ —but if he wants to keep all the Hannahs separate then that’s… fine. It’s fine.

(But he fell in love with Hannah B, didn’t he? If all the Hannahs are separate, then does he even love _her_?)

“Todd,” she says, more to break herself out of her own thoughts than anything. “You want to kiss Todd.”

“Uh, I mean…” Curtis shrugs, only looking slightly uncomfortable. “Doesn’t everyone want to kiss Todd?”

And that’s… well, that’s kind of true, isn’t it? After all, _she_ wanted to kiss Todd for like… ages.

(Although, was that even really a crush? Or was she just drawn to Todd because he’s the Pure Evil One, and she was built to be his vessel?)

Jenny clearly likes kissing Todd, too, though, even if it took her a while to realize it. Even Atticus is… well, maybe Atticus doesn’t want to kiss Todd, but he’s clearly _obsessed_ with Todd.

Maybe it’s a Pure Evil One thing. Maybe there’s just something attractive about being the Chosen One of Evil.

“Okay, but…” Hannah shifts against Curtis’s side slightly, feels the shift of her panties against his thigh where her leg is wrapped around his under the blankets. “Have you ever… _actually_ kissed Todd? Other than, you know, the gay book time, I guess.”

It feels _thrilling_ , somehow, to ask Curtis this. Thrilling and _naughty_ , somehow even more so than most of the very naughty vagina exploring they’ve been doing for weeks.

(Okay, she _has_ to stop calling it vagina exploring.)

“Um, I mean, I guess?” Curtis says. He scratches the back of his head awkwardly, glancing back at the movie like it might hold some answers. “You know. A few times, when we were really high. Or, I guess—okay well there was one time when he just wanted to show me this new tongue thing he read about on the internet, like a kissing technique? And then another time we were at a party and some asshats threw us in a closet together for seven minutes in heaven and we figured _what the hell_. But I guess we were high that time too. And, uh, then there’s the times we jerked off together, but we didn’t usually kiss—”

“You jerked off together?” Hannah interrupts, pulling away so she can sit back on her knees and have a better view of Curtis’s face.

“Uh…yeah. Don’t girls do that, too? Jerk off with their… friends…”

Curtis sounds mostly relaxed, but his face is getting very red, in the glow off the horror movie and the rocket-shaped nightlight.

“No,” Hannah says, cocking her head. “At least, I never have.” She can feel her long hair brush over her bare shoulders, and she appreciates the way Curtis’s eyes follow the flow of her hair, come to rest on her bare chest, and then flick back up to her face. She can feel the wetness growing between her legs, and she wonders if he knows. She sees him gulp, sees the bob of his throat, and she gives him a wicked grin—she learned a thing or two from Hannah E.

“Curtis,” she says, leaning towards him until her bare chest is pressed flush against his. “Are you _attracted_ to Todd?”

She feels him gulp again. “Is this… is this a trick question?” he asks, his voice going delightfully high pitched.

“Would you like it if _I_ was Todd?” she asks, instead of answering him.

She sees his eyes go wide, and she grins again.

“What?” he squeaks.

“You know,” she says, reaching up to run a hand through his hair. “Like, a roleplay thing. You could call me Todd.”

“Like… at school? Wouldn’t that get confusing?”

This is the airheaded Curtis that she should find annoying but instead she finds so, so endearing.

“No, Curtis. Not at school. While we’re having _sex_.”

And there it is. She sees the understanding cross his face, and more than that, the _want_.

“Do you… _want_ me to call you Todd while we have sex?” he asks, his voice barely a whisper.

“ _Yes_ ,” she says, throwing her legs around his waist so she’s straddling his lap. “Call me Todd, Curtis.” And then she presses her mouth to his, _hard_ , and grinds down against his half-hard cock.

She feels his dick twitch instantly, and she kisses him harder, bites down on his lip. When she pulls away slightly, his eyes are closed, and he doesn’t even seem to have to think to moan, “ _Todd…_ ” into her mouth.

And that one word goes straight to her crotch. If she was wet before, now she’s dripping. She doesn’t know why this is so good, but it _is_. It’s perfect.

Maybe it’s because there’s still a part of her body that knows it was supposed to be a vessel—that wants to _be_ Todd, or at least what Todd is.

Or maybe it’s just the simple fact that Todd is hot. And the fact that Curtis thinks that Todd’s hot is hot. And the fact that Curtis wants to call Hannah _Todd_ while they fuck is hot.

What? She’s allowed to be horny, too.

Whatever it is, it’s _absolutely_ doing it for her. She reaches down, between her spread legs, and grabs his dick through his boxers. She tries to imagine how Todd would touch him—rough, but a little bit awkward, too.

“Has Todd ever done _this_?” she whispers against his ear, and she starts to move her hand, palming at him through the fabric.

“Um, yeah, actually, a few times, but—”

“You’ve jerked _each other_ off?” she asks, not sure if she’s more surprised or delighted. She doesn’t stop rubbing at him through his boxers.

“Um.” Another gulp. “This was before you and I were dating, I swear.”

She pauses for half a second. Somehow, it hadn’t even occurred to her to be jealous. She’d been on _fire_ with jealousy at the thought of Charlotte touching him, back when Charlotte was around, but the thought of Todd touching him fills her with a completely different kind of fire. Why is that? Because Todd’s a guy? Because a part of her is still attracted to Todd, too?

Like a lot of things in her life currently, Hannah decides it’s easier to just not think about it. She goes back to her ministrations, lets her mouth slide down from his lips to his neck and bites down in a way that she hopes its appropriately Todd-like.

“Doesn’t matter,” she says, letting her voice drop low. “I’m Todd now.”

It should sound cheesy, but it’s clearly working for Curtis just as much as it’s working for her. He _whimpers_ when she bites at his neck again, and then he arches his back and _gasps_ when she stops touching him through his boxers and sticks her hand _in_ his boxers.

“ _Todd_ ,” he says again, breathlessly, and she picks up her pace, heat and desire and excitement pooling in her stomach.

She keeps kissing his neck, his chest, keeps her mouth off of his so that his mouth is free to keep saying Todd’s name.

She starts kissing lower, pushes down his boxers, prepares to take him into her mouth—but then she feels him pause.

“Um, Todd?”

And that isn’t a moan or a gasp. He’s just calling her _Todd_ , in his normal voice, and somehow that sparks a whole new excitement in her.

“Mmm-hmm?” she replies, her mouth still resting against his stomach.

“Can I…” He leans forward, puts a hand on each of her shoulders—one soft and warm, the other cool and hard and oddly thrilling, knowing how easily he can pin her down with the arm she built for him.

He pushes against her shoulders, and then suddenly she’s on her back, her legs hooked around his waist, but now he’s pressing down against _her_ , grinding against her already achingly wet vagina.

(She’s never liked the word _pussy_ , but _vagina_ feels so clinical. _Cunt_ just sounds mean, and—okay, wow, he’s _really_ grinding against her now, and all thoughts of linguistics go out the window.)

“Condom,” she gasps, but he’s already pulling one out from their stash in her bedside table.

The laptop is still open on the bed, just a few feet away from her head, and the sounds of screaming and bloody chainsaw murder should be a turn off but somehow, they’re not.

(Because there’s still some traces of Evil Hannah in her Just Hannah brain? Because months of Book Stuff has thoroughly desensitized her to the sound of death?)

She watches him roll the condom on (he’s gotten really good at doing it one-handed, since they quickly learned that the robot arm is way too much of a condom-tearing hazard) and then he looks her dead in the eyes and asks, “Can I, Todd?”

She almost comes on the spot. “Do it,” she says, her voice as low and gruff as she can make it.

And then he slides into her— _hard_ , harder and rougher than he’s ever been with her before and she _loves_ it. His grip on her hips is punishingly rough and she’s almost salivating at the thought of the bruises his fingers with leave on her skin. On _Todd’s_ skin. It’s all getting a little hazy.

He goes back to gasping Todd’s name, moaning it with every thrust of his hips, and she bucks her hips up to meet him, reaches up and grabs his wrists with a grip with just as punishing as his grip on her hips. She wants to leave bruises on him too, wants them both to remember everything about this night.

They’ve had enough sex in the past few weeks that she knows exactly when he’s getting close, and she sits up, folds herself nearly in half so that she can press her lips to his again, kisses him as hard and messy and Todd-like as she can.

She’s getting close, too. So close, and then his grip on her hips tightens just slightly, and he bites at her mouth—hard—in a way that he never has before, and then she’s _coming_ , with a thrilling, full-body shudder, and the name that rips out of her throat and past her lips when she pulls away from his mouth shocks her as much as everything that’s happened tonight.

“Ah! _Jenny!_ ”

Her eyes snap open as she rides the high of her orgasm, and Curtis’s eyes are wide open too, staring at her in shock at the sound of Jenny’s name from her lips.

And then, not a second later, like Hannah’s _Jenny!_ was the last push he needed, Curtis is coming too, his dick twitching inside her, and their bodies are slick and hot and sweaty and pressed so close together, and he closes his eyes and moans, “ _Todd…_ ”

And Hannah comes again.

* * *

It takes them a minute to come down from their orgasms. They’re both lying on their backs, the horror movie still playing faintly beside them, their chests heaving and their hands tangled loosely together.

“That,” Hannah says, when she’s finally caught her breath. “Was the best orgasm of my life.”

“Holy shit,” Curtis says. He turns his head, and she turns hers to meet his gaze, and he’s grinning so hugely that it makes her heart flip-flop inside her chest. “It totally was.”


	2. Curtis

The whole Todd-and-Jenny roleplay thing becomes their new go-to. If the sex was good before, it’s _terrific_ now.

Curtis has never thought of himself as kinky. Is this even a kink? Roleplaying as your best friends while having sex?

Well, whatever it is, it’s blowing Curtis’s _mind_.

When they fuck, it’s like Hannah becomes this Hannah-and-Todd hybrid that’s straight out of his wildest wet dreams.

Because, if he’s being honest, Hannah and Todd both feature heavily in almost every wet dream and masturbatory fantasy that he has. Hannah is a relatively recent addition, though. Until this year, he hadn’t even noticed her around the school.

Todd, though, has been a permanent feature of Curtis’s jack-off material ever since he first discovered jacking off. Sure, he’s cycled through other crushes—usually on pretty girls but occasionally on pretty guys and also, often, on the porn stars from Jimmy’s eccentric collection. But the one thing he’s sure of is that he has always been hopeless, helplessly in love with his best friend.

He’s never exactly _told_ Todd this, but he knows that Todd knows. Todd _has_ to know. Unfortunately, Todd is Very, _Very_ Straight.

Todd has never really seemed to have a problem with gay guys—as far as Curtis can tell, Todd seems to consider gayness as a kind of counter-culture punk thing, sort of like being emo or getting tattoos. Curtis has told Todd about some of his dude-crushes—because Curtis pretty much tells Todd everything—and Todd reacted with the same level of enthusiasm as he does to all of Curtis’s crushes. Which is to say, he didn’t seem to care that much one way or the other, but he never gave Curtis shit for it.

Todd has made it extremely clear that _he’s_ not gay, though, any time his sexuality comes even a little bit into question.

Like that time Jenny’s friend wanted to have a threesome with them.

(Actually, that was a book thing, wasn’t it? Curtis was pretty much high out of his mind for most of the beginning of the book stuff, so the details are fuzzy. He’s eased up on the weed since getting with Hannah, so he can remember the recent Book Stuff a lot more clearly than the early Book Stuff. He’s still not sure if that’s a good thing or not.)

But whether or not that girl actually wanted to have a threesome with them, Curtis _definitely_ wanted to have that threesome. A hot girl _and_ Todd? Curtis literally couldn’t imagine anything better than that.

And although Todd _begrudgingly_ agreed to that doomed threesome, he made it clear that he didn’t want his junk anywhere near another dude’s junk.

And then there was the whole gay book thing—Curtis remembers that one a little more clearly, because not even being totally baked could make him forget the time that he _actually got to kiss Todd Smith_.

But even then, even when the book was _explicitly making Todd gay_ , Todd insisted that he was straight.

There had been other times, too, even before the book. When guys at school said shit about Todd’s long hair or his bracelets or the black nail polish he sometimes used to wear, or when people made joking comments about how Curtis and Todd were pretty much inseparable and were _probably totally fucking, those faggots._

Todd always made sure to shut that shit _down._ He was _straight_. He liked _boobs_ and _vaginas_ and, specifically, _Jenny Kolinsky’s_ boobs and vagina. (There had been other girls, before Jenny. In middle school it was Sage LaPierre, and in elementary school it was Danielle Miller. Curtis had been there for all of them.)

But it never stopped Todd from hanging out with Curtis, or from dressing how he wanted—he did stop wearing the nail polish at some point, though, which Curtis thinks is a _tragedy_ , because Todd looked _hot_ with nail polish.

The point is, though, that Todd is straight. Sure, like he told Hannah, they’ve jerked off together a few times, kissed a few times, but Todd always did it in a _straight_ way. And that’s fine—Curtis gave up on ever having sex with Todd Smith years ago.

(Except there was that one time, with all the plants, and they were… cavemen? Curtis is pretty sure they _did_ have sex that time, but again, Book Stuff. Hard to remember, doesn’t count.)

So when Hannah says _call me Todd, Curtis_ , it’s everything that Curtis didn’t know he wanted. It’s not quite a threesome with a hot girl and Todd, but it’s something like it—it’s sex with a hot girl who _is_ Todd, in the moment, and in some ways that’s even _hotter_.

And then there’s the Jenny thing.

Jenny is, undeniably, a babe. Curtis has never really been into her, partly because she’s a little too hardcore for him, and partly because she’s always been Todd’s crush—bros before hoes and all that.

But she _is_ hot, and more importantly, _Todd_ thinks she’s hot, so it just feels _right_ when Hannah-as-Todd comes with Jenny’s name on her lips, not Curtis’s.

He should probably want Hannah-as-Todd to call his name when she comes, but—as much as he wants it—Curtis has a hard time believing that the real Todd would ever want him like that. But he knows that the real Todd _does_ want Jenny like that, so when Hannah is Todd… Curtis really, _really_ likes being Jenny.

And, okay, it’s not like Curtis has ever really wanted to _be_ a girl, but… He’d be lying if he said he didn’t _love_ having boobs during that whole Fisting Fantasy thing, and he’s always liked playing as a girl in video games when he has the option.

It’s _fun_ , okay? Being Jenny, when he’s alone with Hannah, is _fun_ , and it makes him feel _sexy_ in a way he really never has before.

He doesn’t know exactly what Hannah gets out of it. Does she just get so into her Todd persona that calling Jenny’s name feels right? Or does Hannah get off on the idea of having sex with Jenny, the same way Curtis gets off on the idea of having sex with Todd?  
He doesn’t know, because even though they play this game almost every time they fuck, they never actually _talk_ about it.

It’s kind of a weird thing to talk about, okay? And it doesn’t matter anyways, because it _works_ for them.

Boy does it ever work for them.

Hannah doesn’t talk much about her parents or her past—understandably—but Curtis does know that no matter how evil they were, Hannah’s parents did leave her a pretty big nest egg. She uses it mostly to do boring things like buy groceries and pay the electricity bill, but she also, apparently, uses it to buy sex stuff.

A couple weeks after the first time they did their Todd-and-Jenny thing, Curtis comes over to find Hannah sprawled out on her bed, legs spread wide, completely naked except for a shiny, erect strap-on that bobs slightly when she turns her body to face him.

“So Todd can fuck you,” she says brightly, and Curtis’s brain almost short circuits.

After the strap-on comes lingerie, not for Hannah but for Curtis—lacy black bras and panties that scream _Jenny_. Curtis wears them without hesitation, and it’s a thrill every time Hannah tears them off of him before pounding into him with her shiny black strap-on, growling Jenny’s name while he calls Todd’s.

Somewhere in the back of his mind, Curtis thinks that he should be embarrassed about all of this, but he’s _not_. He’s just so incredibly, incredibly turned on, and the best part is that he knows that Hannah is, too.

Sometimes, they’ll lock eyes, in class or during a Book Stuff meeting or while running for their lives from something bloody and gross, and he’ll _know_ that she’s thinking the exact same thing that he is—thinking about the hot, filthy, unbelievably satisfying Todd-and-Jenny themed sex they’ll be having that night.

* * *

Curtis is not good at keeping secrets from Todd. He’s good at _forgetting_ to tell Todd things—like how he forgot to tell Todd or _anyone_ about the weird clone pods that he and Hannah found before she died. Although in his defense, he was pretty distraught after all of that—having your best friend slash life-long crush kill your current girlfriend is not a good time.

But, generally, Curtis tells Todd _everything_. They’ve been best friends since elementary school, after all, and Curtis is pretty sure there isn’t anything Todd doesn’t know about him. Hell, Todd is _responsible_ for at least fifty percent of who Curtis is as a person. If it weren’t for Todd, Curtis never would have gotten into heavy metal, or into smoking weed. He would have never lost his arm—and while having one arm isn’t a personality trait or a hobby, it’s definitely the first thing people notice when they see him, and it’s Todd’s fault, which is so utterly weird to think about that Curtis kind of wishes that that memory had stayed repressed.

Hell, Todd is the reason Curtis started eating corn chips, too—he remembers the first time he tasted those sinful snacks, when Todd bought him a pack from a vending machine as an _I’m sorry_ gift after another horrible birthday misadventure. (Was it after the coma or the broken leg? Hard to remember.)

Point is, Todd is responsible for half the things that happen in Curtis’s life, and he always immediately tells Todd about the other half, too.

Until now.

It’s not like he and Hannah ever sat down with each other and said _we absolutely can’t tell Todd and Jenny that we pretend to be them every time we fuck_. But, well, Curtis doesn’t think it’s something they _need_ to sit down and say. It’s just a fact.

They totally can’t tell them.

That doesn’t stop him from telling Todd about all the _super hot sex_ he and Hannah are constantly having, though. He doesn’t have to go into the details to brag.

And like hell he’s going to let Todd show him up, when he’s always going on about how _great in the sack_ he is with Jenny.

(A part of Curtis wonders if Todd and Jenny are doing any freaky shit in bed that Todd’s not telling him, too.)

On one Friday afternoon, they skip math class to get high in the third-floor stairwell. (They get high together _less_ often these days, at Hannah’s request, but that doesn’t mean they _never_ do it.) Todd is describing, in lurid detail, what he and Jenny got up to last night, and Curtis is storing this information away in the back of his blitzed out mind to replay it later tonight with Hannah, when Todd suddenly trails off, staring absently at the joint in his hand.

“And then what happened?” Curtis asks, reaching for the joint.

As good as Hannah’s mechanical skills are, Curtis’s robot arm can still be hard to control at times, and his coordination only gets worse when he’s high. He misses the joint entirely and ends up half-punching Todd in the side of the face, grazing his jaw none-too-gently with his metal knuckles.

“Oops,” Curtis says, giggling.

(He sees a bruise start to form on the edge of Todd’s jaw almost immediately, and he has to fight to swallow down the voice in his head that whispers _hickey._ )

Luckily, Todd is too high to be mad. Instead, Curtis’s accidental punch just seems to shake him out of whatever mental rut he’d fallen into. He blinks at Curtis, passes him the joint, and then says, seemingly at random, “Do you think Jenny would want to have a threesome?”

Curtis, halfway through taking a drag on the joint, starts coughing uncontrollably at Todd’s words.

“Whoa, dude,” Todd says. He leans over and slaps Curtis on the back until he stops choking.

Curtis gasps, fighting to catch his breath, and then croaks, “A threesome with… _us_?”

“What? No, dude, I know you’re with Hannah,” Todd says, shaking his head with a little laugh.

Curtis tries to keep his face neutral, even though his heart—which had jumped up into his throat the second Todd said _threesome_ —is now plummeting down to his toes.

“Just, like, a threesome in general,” Todd muses, completely oblivious to Curtis’s world shattering right next to him. “Hopefully with some hot girl, but I guess it could be with a guy if she’d be more into that.”

A tiny, tiny spark of hope flares in Curtis’s chest at the news that Todd hasn’t completely ruled out threesomes with guys.

“But I know Jenny likes chicks, too, so I’m sure she’d be into a hot girl-on-girl-on-Todd threesome.”

Todd leans back, grinning dopily, and grabs the joint back from Curtis.

“Why are you—uh—thinking about threesomes?” Curtis wheezes, still recovering from his Todd-induced cough attack.

“I mean, I guess I’m thinking about foursomes,” Todd says, and Curtis almost has another cough attack. “Because I was talking to Jimmy the other day, and he said—get this—sometimes Nikki turns into the Metal Dudes and they have an _actual_ foursome.”

Todd is staring at Curtis wide-eyed, like this is the craziest shit he’s ever heard. And, okay, to be fair, that is some pretty crazy shit.

“Didn’t Nikki say she wasn’t going to turn into the Metal Dudes anymore? You know, to stop them from trying to end the world or whatever?” Curtis asks.

Todd shrugs. “I guess? But Jimmy said he told her he really wanted to have a hot Metal Dudes foursome and she gave in, I guess. Also I think he convinced her to turn into the wolf again? I don’t _think_ he had sex with the wolf…”

Todd pauses, considering this. Curtis wonders briefly if they should be worried about the Metal Dudes coming back, but honestly, he cares a lot more about Todd’s sudden interest in foursomes than he does about the end of the world right now.

“Anyways, Jimmy says that foursomes are like, _the best_ ,” Todd says, almost dreamily. “So I thought Jenny and I could start with a threesome and, like, work our way up.”

Maybe it’s because of the weed, which always makes Curtis’s almost non-existent brain-to-mouth filter even more non-existent. Or maybe it’s because Curtis doesn’t like keeping secrets from Todd, has never been good at it.

Or maybe it’s because he just really, _really_ wants to hook up with his best friend and his best friend’s hot girlfriend.

But whatever it its, Curtis opens his mouth, his voice still slightly wheezy from coughing, and says, “You could have a foursome with me and Hannah.”

Curtis doesn’t know what he’s expecting. Maybe he expects angels (or demons?) to descend from the heavens, singing in glorious harmony as Todd realizes that _yes_ , this is what it’s always been leading up to, the four of them, together, _carnally._ Or maybe he expects Todd to throw himself at him, to start making out right there in the third-floor stairwell, a warmup to their future girl-on-girl-on-Todd-on-Curtis foursome.

Instead, Todd just laughs. Not even meanly—just matter of fact, like he and Curtis are in on the same joke.

“Yeah, because Hannah is totally the foursome type,” Todd says, shaking his head. “You guys probably do it missionary style with like, classical music playing in the background, right?”

Curtis doesn’t know why that stings, but it does. Okay, sure, they’ve done it missionary style plenty of times, and sometimes Hannah _does_ put on some cheesy music to set the mood.

But Curtis has also been railed in the ass by Hannah’s godly strap-on, screaming Todd’s name while she bites down on his collarbone hard enough to draw blood, drenched in the same perfume that Jenny wears, while Todd’s favourite metal album screeches from Hannah’s laptop on the floor.

“Hannah’s a lot freakier than you think,” Curtis says.

“Hmm,” Todd says thoughtfully, his gaze going distant. “I guess she _was_ kinda freaky that time she made out with me, but that was Evil Hannah, so—”

“Don’t talk about the time you made out with my girlfriend,” Curtis says, shoving Todd with his shoulder.

“What? You literally just said you want me to have a foursome with your girlfriend,” Todd says, shoving him back.

“Yeah, but like, only if I’m there,” Curtis says. “I want you _and_ Hannah.”

And, okay, that’s definitely the weed talking. Curtis is never _this_ direct about how badly he wants Todd, at least not when he’s any semblance of sober.

He’s starting to hope that Todd will get too high to properly remember this conversation later.

“You want to _watch_ me make out with your girlfriend?” Todd asks, narrowing his eyes at Curtis.

That’s not _exactly_ what Curtis said, but he’ll take it.

“Yeah, it would be hot, right?” Curtis says, trying to play it off like _he’s_ not the one who wants to make out with Todd. “And I’d make out with Jenny, and then—”

“Hm, no, I don’t know about that,” Todd says quickly, shaking his head. “Jenny’s _my_ girl, Curtis.”

“Todd, do you even know how foursomes work?” Curtis asks, because he’s beginning to think that Todd _doesn’t_ know.

“I know, I know, but just… You’re my best friend, Curtis, I feel like it would get weird. Do you think Nikki would want to come have a threesome with us? I know she’s with Jimmy now but she might still be up for it. She _was_ really good at sex that one time, even if it was kind of weird, and also she’s the Metal Dudes, but she’s still hot. Or what about Dee? Jenny would be into that. Although I guess she’d have to bring her freaky twin along. Not so into that. Actually, is Dee still alive? She didn’t die because of any Book Stuff, did she? Wow, it’s hard to keep track.”

Curtis can tell he’s losing this. He was _so close_ to having a foursome with Todd Smith himself, and now the opportunity is slipping away like the smoke that’s curling up from Todd’s mostly-finished joint, and that desperate part of Curtis that has absolutely no filters blurts out, “ _Hannah and I pretend to be you and Jenny when we have sex!_ ”

Todd stops talking instantly. He stares at Curtis, dazed and confused, like Curtis suddenly started speaking in another language.

“You… pretend to be me… when you fuck Hannah?” he asks slowly.

Curtis can feel his face going red. He should stop talking now. He should back-track while he still has a chance. There is no way this is going to end well. He _knows_ this. But—

“No. I… pretend to be Jenny. Hannah pretends to be you.”

Todd is _gaping_ at him now, with an expression of pure confusion on his face that Curtis has only ever seen when Todd is trying to scrape his way through math or science homework.

“Are you… is this like a weird joke?” Todd asks. He doesn’t sound insulted, or grossed out, just genuinely confused.

“No?” Curtis says, more of a question than a statement.

Todd stumbles to his feet, the smouldering joint falling from his fingers and onto the concrete of the stairwell.

“Um. I, uh, I need to—I think I hear Jimmy calling me,” Todd says, backing up towards the stairs.

“What? Todd, wait, Jimmy’s not—”

But it’s too late. Todd has turned around and fled down the stairs, taking them two at a time. By the time Curtis struggles to his feet, Todd is gone.

Curtis feels dizzy—a little bit from the weed, but mostly from how badly that conversation went. He steps on the joint, grinds it into dust under his shoe, and then starts stomping on it, like maybe if he turns it into a fine enough powder it’ll erase all evidence that this conversation ever even happened.

“You absolute shitrooster,” he mutters to himself. “Why did you tell him?”


	3. Todd

Ever since he started high school, whenever Todd needs advice, he has one solution: talk to Jimmy.

Todd wouldn’t say that Jimmy is like a father figure to him—Jimmy is way too young and too cool to be a father—but he’s kind of a like a… a cool, wise older brother.

Todd is an only child, and while his parents aren’t as outright shitty as Curtis’s, or as dead and/or MIA as Hannah and Jenny’s, they’ve always just kind of been… non-existent in Todd’s life. Always at work, or away on mysterious “business trips” that Todd never used to question but now suspects might be some kind of Evil Satanic Business Trips, because everything in Todd’s life seems to be Evil and Satanic these days.

But whether his parents are secretly evil or not, Todd spent more of his childhood in daycare than he ever did with dear old mom and dad, and he’s been a latchkey kid since he was old enough to make himself Kraft Dinner without burning down the house.

(Well, he still sets off the fire alarm at least once a month, but the house is still intact.)

The point is, Jimmy is the closest thing that Todd has ever had to parental guidance in his life, and although it would be way too mushy and gross to _tell_ Jimmy how much he means to him, Todd really does consider Jimmy one of the most important people in his life. And definitely the wisest person.

Which is why Todd is currently fast-walking down the hall, away from the third-floor stairwell and right to Jimmy’s office.

(It’s still weird to go to the guidance counsellor’s office for guidance—Todd almost accidentally veers off towards the janitor’s closet, but he definitely does _not_ want to talk to Atticus about this, even if he is part of the “gang” now.)

“Jimmy!” Todd says, when he reaches the office and throws the door open. “What do I do if my best friend wants to have a freaky foursome with me?”

Todd should really know by now to check the room before bombarding Jimmy with his problems, but Todd has never been one for impulse control.

He kind of wishes he had at least _some_ impulse control, though, because now not only Jimmy but _two_ hot babes know about Todd’s foursome problem. One of these hot babes is currently straddling Jimmy’s lap and giving Todd a very dirty look over her shoulder. The other one is peeking her head up from behind Jimmy’s desk, and it doesn’t take a genius to figure out what she was doing down there.

“Aw, Jimmy, gross, in the guidance counsellor’s office? Somehow this seems so much more wrong than the janitor’s closet,” Todd says, closing the door behind him to give the women at least _some_ privacy.

“I totally thought I locked the door,” Jimmy says. “Also, aren’t you supposed to be in class?”

“Since when do you care about me being in class?” Todd asks. And then he looks at the two women again, and something dawns on him. “Are you _cheating_ on Nikki?”

“No way, man,” Jimmy says. “We have an open relationship.”

Todd narrows his eyes at Jimmy. “Do you _actually_ have an open relationship, or are you just saying that the way sleazy guys say that when they definitely _don’t_ have an open relationship?”

“You wound me, little dude. You think I’m sleazy?”

Todd continues giving Jimmy that narrow-eyed look. Nikki might have broken his heart, and she might be a fusion of three evil dudes, but there’s a part of Todd that’s still in love with her, and he doesn’t want Jimmy to fuck her over.

“Cross my heart, dude,” Jimmy says, reaching around the woman on his lap to put a hand to his heart. “We have a legit open relationship. You want me to call her? I’ll call her. She’ll tell you all about it. You think you can hold someone like Nikki down with monogamy? Nah, man. We’re free birds, the both of us.”

“Um, should we leave?” the woman behind the desk asks.

“Yeah, I’ll see you two after school,” Jimmy says, leaning back as the woman on his lap gets up with a pout. “We’ll pick up where we left off.”

Todd watches the women leave—lap lady gives him one more death glare—and then turns back to Jimmy.

“So, are you interested in the art of the foursome, my young pupil?” Jimmy asks, leaning forward with his elbows propped up on his desk.

“Um.” Todd sits down awkwardly in the chair across from Jimmy. It’s still so weird to be talking to him here. “Maybe?”

“Let me tell you, little dude, when it comes to sex? The more the merrier. That’s what I say.”

“Okay…” Todd says, trying very hard not to conjure an image of Jimmy and the Metal Dudes having an enthusiastic orgy. “But what if the foursome isn’t the freakiest part?”

“Are foursomes freaky?” Jimmy asks, turning the question back on Todd in that wise old mentor way that he does.

“I don’t know! Kind of!” Todd says. “But that’s not the point!”

“Then what is the point, dude?”

“The point is that my best friend pretends to be my girlfriend when he has sex with his girlfriend who pretends to be me!”

Todd can actually _see_ the gears turning in Jimmy’s head while he tries to figure out what Todd just said. And now that Todd’s said it out loud, he feels even weirder about it.

“Forget it,” he says, standing up. “Never mind, it’s probably not that big of a deal, it’s fine.”

“Man, even I’ve never roleplayed as people I know when I fuck. That’s next-level, man,” Jimmy says.

“Yeah, well, apparently Curtis and Hannah are way more next-level than I thought,” Todd says.

“Hey, wait, don’t go yet, little dude,” Jimmy says, and Todd pauses halfway between the chair and the door. “Does it bother you, that they’re roleplaying as you?”

“Yes? No? I don’t know! Should it?” Todd says. He turns around and flops back down into the chair.

“Only you can answer that question for yourself, little man,” Jimmy says. “One man’s freak out is another man’s turn on.”

Todd thinks that he should be freaked out. It’s weird, right? Any normal person would think that what Curtis told him is weird.

But what’s freaking Todd out the most, if he’s being totally honest with himself, isn’t what Curtis said. It’s that Todd kind of _does_ want to have that foursome, and that Curtis’s words didn’t make him want to have it any less.

If anything, what Curtis said got Todd’s dick a lot more interested than he’d like to admit, and _that’s_ freaky.

“Okay… so… let’s say it _wasn’t_ a complete turn off,” Todd says slowly. “Do I just… have a foursome? With my best friends? I feel like that could end badly.”

“A lot of things in life could end badly,” Jimmy says. “Doesn’t mean you shouldn’t try ‘em.”

Todd wants to ask more, but at that moment the school bell rings, and Todd hears the rush of students exiting their classrooms and streaming out into the halls.

“Well,” Jimmy says, standing up. “Duty calls. And by duty, I mean those two smokin’ babes who are waiting for me in the parking lot outside.”

Todd scowls, watching Jimmy make his way to the door.

“I liked you better when you were stuck inside the school!” he calls after him, but Jimmy doesn’t even bother to turn around. He just flips Todd the bird and disappears into the waves of students, released from the final class of the day.

* * *

That night, Todd dreams about Nikki.

It’s definitely not the first time he’s dreamt about Nikki. A part of him feels kind of guilty, like he’s subconsciously cheating on Jenny. But Nikki was his first time, even if the circumstances were kind of weird and uncomfortable, and it’s hard to forget that. Also, Nikki’s _hot_.

In his dream, Todd is back in that bed at the house party, half undressed, with Nikki looming over him.

“Hey, _Todd_ ,” she says, in that dark, sultry voice. “Let’s _fuck_.”

Dream Nikki gets to the point just as quickly as Real Nikki does.

Dream Todd is way more suave than Real Todd was at that party, though. He leans back casually, winding his fingers into Nikki’s hair, and pulls her closer.

“C’mere, baby,” he murmurs, and then they’re making out, her lips soft against his, her stubble rough against his face—wait, stubble?

Todd’s eyes snap open, and suddenly it’s not Nikki he’s making out with. It’s one of the Metal Dudes, the one with the bandana. Bob? Rob? Todd should probably know their names by now.

Whatever his name is, he’s leaning over Todd, his long dark hair falling like curtains around his face, giving Todd the same half-lidded look that Nikki had been giving him before.

“Let’s fuck, _loser_ ,” he says.

“Whoa, what the hell?” Todd shouts, tying to squirm his way out from under the Metal Dude.

“Aww, you don’t want to have fun with us, little dude?”

Todd whips his head around to see another Metal Dude, the blonde one, splayed out casually on the bed beside him, stripped down to nothing but a pair of pentagram-printed boxers.

“No way!” Todd says, backing up until he hits the headboard behind him. “You guys are dudes! _And_ you’re evil!”

“You’re evil, too, _loser_ ,” says the third Metal Dude from where he’s sitting at the end of the bed, halfway through pulling off his pants.

“Not like you guys!” Todd protests.

“Aw, c’mon, loser,” the bandana-wearing Metal Dude says, stalking up the bed towards Todd in a disturbingly Nikki-like way. “You’ve already fucked us before. Why not go for round two?”

“I fucked you guys when you were a hot girl!” Todd says. “That’s different!”

“Is it _really_?” blonde Metal Dude asks, leaning towards Todd. “You kind of want to try us out like this, don’t you? Just like Jimmy.”

“No way!” Todd says. “I definitely, definitely _don’t_ want that.”

Todd sees the three of them exchange looks, and then they all turn back to him with matching evil grins that make Todd’s stomach plummet to his toes.

“Then how about _like this_?” they ask in creepy unison, and then suddenly it’s not the Metal Dudes crowded around him on the bed.

It’s not Nikki that’s looming over him, either. It’s Jenny, wearing her favourite bra, black and trimmed in lace, her hair a little mussed and her makeup a little smudged. He’s seen her like this dozens of times, leaning over him, giving him a look that’s halfway between a grin and an eyeroll.

“How’s this, Todd?” she asks, and Todd’s dick immediately stands at attention. Jenny’s voice alone can get him rock hard. She has such a nice voice.

“You like this, don’t you, Todd?” asks a voice to Todd’s left, and he turns to see, not the blonde Metal Dude, but Hannah, in nothing but a soft purple bra and lacy underwear. She leans towards Todd and presses a gentle kiss to his lips, and then pulls away just enough to say, “We like this, too.”

“Yeah, Todd.” And it’s Curtis sitting at the end of the bed, now, his pants halfway down his thighs. “We _really_ like this.”

“Curtis, I don’t know if—” But he’s interrupted by Hannah, pressing her lips to his again. And she’s a _good_ kisser. Todd loses himself in Hannah’s kiss, and in Jenny grinding down against him.

And then, at some point, it’s not Hannah he’s kissing anymore. It’s Curtis, and his kiss is a little sloppier than Hannah’s, but it’s still so much better than it has any right to be.

And Todd _wants it_. He wants all of this, _so bad_ , and all of their hands and mouths are on him, and he’s _so close_ , and then—

And then, suddenly, he’s not the one lying in the middle of the bed anymore. He’s sitting on the edge of the bed, and he looks down at himself to see a soft purple bra and lace underwear.

He’s _Hannah_ , he realizes. And he looks up, across the bed, and sees Curtis give him a wink that is so undeniably _Jenny_ that he’s sure that Jenny has switched bodies, too.

And, in the middle of the bed, still fucking and kissing, are Todd and Jenny’s bodies. And Todd _knows_ , in the way that you just _know_ things in your dreams, that it’s really Hannah and Curtis in the middle of the bed, making out with all the passion of a porno.

And it’s _fucking hot._ He reaches for them, wants to be part of what’s happening again, but before he can touch the two people in the middle of the bed—

He wakes up. He’s in his own bedroom, in the dark. He’s hard as a rock, and he’s helplessly turned on by all three of his friends.

“Shit,” he says.


	4. Jenny

The truth is that Todd is not as great in the sack as he thinks he is, but he’s also not as bad as Jenny makes him out to be. She just likes to give him a hard time. Really, he’s one of her better boyfriends, when it comes to hitting all her buttons in just the right way.

The thing about Todd is that, despite his many, _many_ flaws, he actually really does care about Jenny, and he _really_ cares about making Jenny feel good. Jenny has had enough shitty boyfriends who just want to use her to get themselves off, and Todd is _not_ that guy. His techniques might be a little sloppy, but he wasn’t bullshitting every time he said he was head over heels for her.

Also, Todd fucking _loves_ eating her out, so Jenny’s pretty sure she hit the jackpot with him.

It’s a Friday night, and Jenny is laying back against the silky black sheets of her bed, her legs spread, and Todd’s mouth is working _magic_ on her clit.

“Mm… Todd…” she moans, reaching forward to bury her fingers in his hair. God, she loves his hair. It’s thick and it’s _soft_ and it curls so nicely when he’s all sweaty and damp, and it’s perfect for grabbing fistfuls of when his head is between her legs.

She pulls slightly, and she feels him gasp against her cunt. God, he’s getting good at this.

He sucks harder on her clit, thrusts into her with his tongue, uses just the tiniest amount of teeth, and…

“ _Fuck_ , Todd!” she shouts, because she was _this close_ but for some reason he’s pulling away.

“Hey, uh, Jenny? I have a question—”

“Well you can ask me your question _after_ you finish down there,” Jenny says, breathing heavily. That near-orgasm high is starting to slip away and she just wants Todd to _get back to it._

“It’s just that I’ve been trying to figure out how to bring this up all day and—”

She groans and lets her head fall back against the pillows. “Fine, Todd, what is it? This better be fucking important.”

“Um.”

She lifts her head, prepared to tell him to _spit it out already_ … But then she sees his face, and he looks genuinely nervous, and her heart softens a bit.

“What is it?” she asks. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah, I’m fine, but, um…” He takes a deep breath, like he’s psyching himself up, and then says all in one breath, “Would you want to have a foursome with Curtis and Hannah?”

Of all the things Jenny might have expected Todd to ask, that was _not_ one of them.

“ _What?_ ”

“Ok, don’t freak out!” Todd says. “Let me explain. See, Jimmy was telling me about his foursomes with the Metal Dudes—”

“Nikki turned back into the Metal Dudes?” Jenny interrupts, sitting up straight. No way, she is _not_ letting those greasy dudes try to lure Todd to the side of evil again.

“Only sometimes! Jimmy has it under control. I think. Anyways, that’s not the point—”

“I am having a _serious_ conversation with Jimmy about this on Monday.”

“ _Anyways_ … Jimmy told me that foursomes are the shit, and then I told Curtis that I wanted to have a threesome, and I thought maybe it could be, like, you and Dee, or you and Nikki—”

“I am _never_ having a threesome with that skank.”

“Right. Well. Then Curtis said that we could just have a foursome… with him and Hannah?”

Jenny narrows her eyes at Todd. He still looks nervous, with that puppy dog look on his face that has no right to be so endearing.

“Todd. Were you and Curtis high when you had this conversation?”

Todd winces. “ _Yes_ , but—”

“Okay, new rule, you can’t trust anything Curtis ever says when he’s high,” Jenny says decisively.

Todd snorts. “Jenny, that’s like, almost _all_ the time.”

“Then just never trust anything Curtis says, ever.”

Todd shakes his head. “C’mon, Jenny, he was being serious.”

Jenny rolls her eyes. “Okay, fine, I can definitely see Curtis wanting to have a threesome with you—”

“With me?”

“Yes, with you, Todd. He’s _obviously_ so fucking horny for you.”

“ _Is_ he?”

Jenny stares at Todd for a second, dumbfounded. “ _Yes_ , Todd, obviously. Do you seriously not know?”

“No way, man, Curtis is straight. Or like, mostly straight. Cause he had the thing with Charlotte. And now Hannah, so—”

“Todd. Bisexuality. We’ve had this conversation before. I’m bisexual, Curtis is obviously bisexual—”

“Wait, I thought you were straight now,” Todd interrupts. “’Cause like, we’re together, so—”

“Todd, I will literally strangle you right now. That is _not_ how it works.”

“Okay, okay!” Todd says, dodging Jenny’s attempt to kick some sense into him. “I’m sorry! I just… do you think Curtis is actually horny for me?”

“ _Yes_ , Todd. _So_ horny.”

“Wow…” Todd says, staring off somewhere over Jenny’s shoulder.

For a terrifying moment, Jenny thinks he’s going to say something really shitty. Being too stupid to understand how bisexuality works she can handle, but being outright homophobic is a dealbreaker, and she really doesn’t want to break up with Todd when he’s getting _so good_ at oral sex—

“I’m _hot_ ,” Todd says finally.

“What?”

“You like me, Hannah had a crush on me, _Curtis_ has a crush on me,” Todd says, counting them off on his fingers. “I must be _hot_.”

Jenny rolls her eyes. “No, Todd, we just all have bad taste.”

“Hey!”

“Todd, I believe that Curtis would wanna have a foursome with you, but there’s no way Hannah would be into it,” Jenny says.

“Hannah has a threesome with you and Curtis in the future,” Todd points out.

Jenny rolls her eyes again. “You keep saying that, but I still don’t believe anything you say about the ‘future’,” Jenny says, doing airquotes around her words.

“It’s true!” Todd insists. “Plus, like, Hannah is _way_ freakier than you think she is.”

“Todd, if this is about that time Evil Hannah sucked you off, we’ve talked about this. Current Hannah is—”

“No, see, that’s what I said, too,” Todd interrupts. “But Curtis told me… uh…”

Todd hesitates, and Jenny wonders what kind of freaky shit Curtis and Hannah could possibly be up to that’s making Todd clam up. He’s not usually the prudish type, so she’s starting to come up with some truly wild shit when Todd finally says, “Uh, Curtis and Hannah roleplay as us when they have sex.”

Once again, of all the things Todd could have said, Jenny did not predict that one.

“Holy _shit_ ,” she says, and then she laughs. “There’s no way Curtis could pull off being you.”

“No, uh, that’s the thing,” Todd says. “Hannah… is me. Apparently.”

Jenny’s eyes widen. “Holy shit,” she says again. Then, “Actually, you know what, I think Hannah probably could pull off you. She did the whole Pure Evil One thing _way_ too well. Curtis _definitely_ can’t do me, though.”

Jenny’s laughing, but Todd isn’t, and her laughter tapers off when she sees the wide-eyed look on Todd’s face. His pupils are huge. He looks… turned on.

“Oh my god, Todd, you’re totally into this,” she says.

“What?” Todd says quickly. “I’m just telling you what Curtis told me. I mean, clearly Hannah and Curtis are totally into us, so it would only be fair to give them a chance at the real thing, right?”

“Nope, no way,” Jenny says, shaking her head. “We are not having a foursome with them if you can’t admit that you’re _totally_ into it.”

“Wait, so… we _will_ have a foursome with them?” Todd asks.

“Do you want to?”

“Uh…”

“Come on, Todd, if you want this, you have to tell me you want this. Communication, remember?”

“Uh, okay…”

Jenny waits to see if he’s actually going to ask her for this. She’s not entirely sure how _she_ feels about a foursome with their two best friends. Curtis is kind of a slob and definitely an idiot, but to be fair, so is Todd. And Hannah—she’s a nerd, but she’s actually really cute, okay? Especially when she’s being assertive.

Honestly, Jenny would kill to see Hannah roleplaying as Todd and _owning_ it.

Really, though, Jenny’s just fascinated by Todd’s reaction to this whole thing. She would have expected Todd to take a hard _no_ on any kind of orgy involving more than one dude, but maybe she was wrong. Maybe Curtis isn’t the only one who gets hot and bothered about his best friend.

“I want to have a foursome with Curtis and Hannah,” Todd says, finally, like he’s telling it to himself as much as he is to Jenny.

“And why is that?” Jenny asks in a low voice, leaning towards Todd. Their conversation distracted her, but now she remembers exactly what they were up to—they’re both naked, and she’s still _so_ wet. She’s allowed to tease him a little bit.

She sees Todd swallow hard, and then he says, “Because I think it would be hot.”

“What would be hot, Todd?” she runs a hand down his bare chest, stopping just above his crotch.

He swallows again. “I think that Curtis and Hannah pretending to be us is hot,” he says, not meeting Jenny’s eyes, his whole body tense under her hands. “And I think that having sex with them while they’re pretending to be us would be _really_ hot.”

“You’re full of surprises, Todd Smith,” Jenny says, and then she leans forward and captures his mouth with hers.

When she pulls away, he’s looking at her with wide eyes. “So is that a yes?” he asks.

She grins. “Yes, Todd. It’s a yes.”

The sex they have that night is mind-blowing, and Jenny would be lying if she said that Hannah and Curtis aren’t in the back of her mind while Todd fucks her. She _knows_ they’re on Todd’s mind, too.

Maybe she does want this foursome, too.

* * *

Jenny seriously underestimated how awkward this was going to be.

They’re having a “house party”, if you can call four friends sitting around in unbearably awkward silence drinking cheap booze in Hannah’s basement a “house party”. It’s a house party only by virtue of it being in a house, and because Todd came up to the three of them that morning and said, “Let’s have a party at Hannah’s tonight.”

Even though Jenny had given Todd her seal of approval on the whole foursome thing, she hadn’t expected him to try and make it happen like _this_.

Because no one else is taking any kind of initiative, Jenny realizes with a groan that _she’s_ going to have to kickstart things around here if anything’s going to happen tonight.

So she swallows down the rest of her vodka and orange juice in one go, slams the empty plastic cup down on the coffee table, and says, “Okay, we all know why we’re here.”

“We do?” Hannah asks, with a look of such wide-eyed confusion that Jenny thinks _oh shit. Maybe they_ don’t _know._

“When you said _let’s have a party at Hannah’s tonight_ , Todd, I kind of assumed you were going to invite other people,” Hannah says, leaning towards Todd before Jenny has a chance to say anything. “Also, _why_ are we at my house?”

Todd looks over at Jenny desperately, like maybe she can explain this for him, but she just shakes her head at him. Nope, no way. This was Todd’s idea, he can tell Hannah all about his sordid plans.

“Um,” Todd says. “Because your parents are dead?”

“ _What?_ ” Hannah says.

“Hey!” Curtis snaps, putting an arm around Hannah’s shoulders. “Don’t talk about her dead parents, dude.”

“What?” Todd says, shrugging. “No parents. Perfect place for a… party.”

“It’s not like your parents are ever home, Todd,” Hannah says, crossing her arms.

“Hey! They might be back from their business trip… sometime this week…” Todd says unconvincingly.

“Or what about Jenny’s place?” Hannah continues. “Her dad is dead too, and her mom hasn’t been home in _months_.”

“It’s true,” Jenny says with a shrug. Her mom was never exactly the nurturing type to begin with, and after Jenny brought her dad back from the retirement home, her mom completely peaced out. She’s not even sure if her mom knows that her dad died.

Whatever. She tries not to think about it.

“I’m sorry! I don’t know!” Todd says, holding his hands up defensively. “I just wanted to make sure no parents interrupted our… party.”

Hannah narrows her eyes at Todd and leans towards him. Curtis still has his arm around Hannah’s shoulders, so he leans too, copying Hannah’s threatening pose.

“What’s this ‘party’ actually about, Todd?” she asks. “Is this a book thing?”

“What? No! No way. No Book Stuff tonight. Cross my heart,” Todd says, actually reaching up and crossing his heart. “I just thought, maybe, we could all get… _closer_ … tonight.”

Hannah and Curtis stare at him blankly. Todd coughs. The whole scene is so embarrassing that Jenny doesn’t even care that she’s been forced to be the one to say, “Todd wants to have a foursome tonight.”

Curtis’s face goes so pale so quickly it looks like he might pass out.

Hannah just looks confused.

“You… do?” she asks Todd.

“Uh… it was Curtis’s idea!” Todd says quickly, pointing at Curtis with an accusatory finger.

Jenny expects Hannah to turn her confusion onto Curtis. Or maybe even anger, or embarrassment, but… Hannah grins, suddenly, so wickedly that it reminds Jenny uncomfortably of Evil Hannah.

“Oh my _god_ , Curtis,” she says, turning to her worryingly pale boyfriend. “I _knew_ it.”

“You did?” Todd asks, at the same time that Curtis says, “Um, only if you want to, sweetie.”

Hannah turns her Evil Hannah look towards Todd, and then Jenny, and then she honest to god _licks her lips_ , and the craziest part is that it’s _hot_.

“Yes, honey,” she says, her eyes still on Jenny. “I _do_.”

Jenny swallows hard, because okay, _that’s_ doing it for her.


	5. Hannah, Again

Hannah thought she was over her Todd crush, or her Todd obsession, or whatever it was. But seeing Todd pull his shirt up over his head, a little bit nervous but _incredibly_ hot… Yeah, she’s not over that crush.

First of all, how the hell is Todd so _buff?_ There’s no way the guy works out. It must be a Pure Evil One thing. Being the chosen one of evil must come with rock hard abs.

Also, how does Todd manage to look so _good_ even though his hair is kind of sticking up from pulling his shirt off, and he’s awkwardly hovering between Jenny and Hannah like he doesn’t know where to put his hands, or his eyes, or any part of him.

Hannah saves him the trouble by reaching forward, grabbing him by the shoulder, and pulling him down to kiss her.

It’s surprisingly easy to kiss Todd. Maybe it’s because they’ve already kissed before. Sure, that was Evil Hannah, but she’s been over this—for all intents and purposes, she _is_ Evil Hannah, at least as far as her memories go.

Or maybe it’s because Todd is just so fucking _kissable_. His lips are surprisingly soft, and even thought she can tell he’s kind of nervous, he’s _good_ at this. Damn, Jenny doesn’t give him enough credit.

Speaking of Jenny, Hannah opens her eyes slightly, still kissing Todd, and sees Jenny leaning forward to press her lips against the side of Todd’s neck. Todd makes an absolutely filthy sound in Hannah’s mouth, and wow. Thank Todd or Curtis or whoever came up with this idea—this is already incredible.

Hannah pulls away from Todd to look over at Curtis, who’s sitting next to her and watching her kiss Todd with an utterly dazed look on his face.

“Like the view?” she whispers to him, and he actually _whimpers._ She presses her mouth to Curtis’s, and she hopes he can taste Todd on her lips.

In this moment, it feels like everything that’s happened to them—all the crushes and the Book Stuff and the Todd-and-Jenny roleplay, all of it—has been leading to this. This feels _right_ , and she knows Curtis wants this.

She pulls away from Curtis and then, just to keep things fair, she leans forward and catches Jenny’s lips with her own over Todd’s shoulder. Jenny seems surprised for half a second, and then she melts into Hannah’s kiss, and _oh wow._ Hannah never realized until this moment how much she wanted Jenny, too.

Whenever Curtis roleplayed as Jenny while they fucked, Hannah always thought of herself as Todd fucking Jenny. It was part of… whatever it was she and Curtis were doing. She never really thought of herself, of Hannah Williams, fucking Jenny.

She’s sure as hell thinking about it now.

“Girl makeout…” Todd breathes in absolute wonder, and Jenny reaches over to punch him in the shoulder.

“Shut up,” she says.

“Ow,” Todd complains. “What? You’re girls and you’re making out. It’s hot.”

“You two should make out,” Hannah says, still sort of leaning up against Todd’s chest, her mouth near Jenny’s.

Todd’s eyes widen. “Us?” he says, at the same moment that Curtis says, “Absolutely.”

Hannah can almost _see_ the war going on behind Todd’s eyes. She doesn’t want to pressure him, doesn’t want him to do something he genuinely doesn’t want to do—that would be very uncool to him _and_ to Curtis.

But she really doesn’t believe that Todd is as straight as Curtis thinks he is—Curtis wasn’t kissing Todd or jerking off with him in a vacuum. Todd had to be part of that stuff too, even if he tacked a big _no homo_ onto it.

For a moment it seems like Todd is going to refuse, and Hannah’s heart squeezes a little at what that’s going to do to Curtis—but then Todd seems to say _fuck it_ , and then he’s leaning over Hannah to kiss Curtis.

And okay, Hannah can see why Todd was so spellbound watching her kiss Jenny. Seeing these two guys—two guys she loves, two guys who she’s been attracted to for ages—making out is honestly the hottest thing she’s ever seen.

“Shit,” Jenny breathes into Hannah’s ear. “I never thought these two losers could actually look so _good_.”

Hannah laughs, and Todd pulls away to punch Jenny back, and then all of a sudden the four of them are rolling around and playfighting on her basement floor.

Hannah’s not sure exactly when playfighting turns into pulling off each other’s clothes, but it doesn’t take very long for all of them to end up wearing very little, and Hannah is feeling _very_ wet down there.

There’s also something she really, _really_ wants to try, but she’s not sure if it’s too much.

“Do you… should I…” Jenny is lying half on top of her now, her thigh between Hannah’s legs, and Hannah has to swallow down a wave of arousal just to get her question out. “Should I go get my toys?”

Jenny freezes. “Toys?”

Todd, who is almost completely naked but still seems to be in playfighting mode because he has Curtis in what looks like a headlock, freezes too.

“Holy shit,” he says. “Toys? You guys _are_ freaky.”

“Toys aren’t freaky!” Hannah defends herself. “They’re a natural and healthy part of exploring one’s sexuality, either alone or with a partner. Or with multiple partners, as the case may be.”

Todd blinks at her. “Okay. And you’re back to nerdy.”

“Yes,” Jenny says, before Hannah can continue schooling Todd on healthy sexuality. “ _Yes_. You should get your toys.”

Todd looks almost betrayed. “You want toys, Jenny? Am I not enough for you?”

Jenny just rolls her eyes in answer.

Hannah, somewhat reluctantly, pulls away from Jenny and stands up. “I’ll be right back,” she says, and runs up the stairs, wearing only her bra and panties.

She keeps their toys and lube and lingerie in a box in her closet. Honestly, she could probably just leave this stuff lying around, between the no parents thing and the fact that Curtis is pretty much the only person who ever comes over to her house, but Hannah likes organisation. Also, it makes it a lot easier to grab the stuff and run back downstairs before anyone has a chance to change their mind.

Hannah still can’t believe they’re doing this. Honestly, she needs to do this before _she_ loses her nerve. It feels like a strange spell has descended on this house, and she needs to take full advantage of it before it breaks.

She gets downstairs in record time, and then pauses when she gets to the base of the staircase. Jenny and Todd are intertwined, leaning back against the couch—and Jenny is leaning over to press her mouth to Curtis’s.

Of all the possible combinations that could happen tonight, Jenny and Curtis seemed the least likely. It didn’t even really occur to Hannah that Curtis and Jenny would be anything more than incidental partners in this whole affair. She knows that Jenny finds Curtis even more annoying than Todd, and honestly, it’s a miracle that Jenny could get over her Todd-annoyance long enough to start dating him. And Curtis has never really shown any interest in Jenny beyond finding her generically hot.

So Hannah really didn’t expect any Jenny-Curtis action tonight, but now that it’s happening—god is she happy that it is.

Curtis is a good kisser. Hannah knows this from experience—maybe not quite Todd’s godlike kissing, but good, better than most people would expect from his, admittedly, slobbish tendencies. And Jenny _is_ hot, hot in a sort of sultry, gothic way that Hannah loves.

And seeing them together—it’s incongruous in a delightful way, and it’s going straight to Hannah’s crotch. For a second, she actually has to remind herself to breathe.

And then she catches Todd’s eye over Jenny’s shoulder, and yup—he’s definitely thinking the exact same thing that she is. Hannah could watch Jenny and Curtis make out forever, and she thinks Todd feels the same.

After a long moment, Jenny pulls away from Curtis slightly and opens her eyes to see Hannah still standing at the bottom of the stairs, holding her box.

“What are you waiting for?” Jenny asks, and Hannah bolts back into _gotta do this fast_ mode.

She kneels down on the floor beside the three of them and opens the box. Todd’s eyes bulge.

“Is that a fucking strap-on?” he asks.

“Yes,” Hannah says.

“Impressive,” Jenny says, but she’s looking at Curtis, eyebrows raised.

Curtis’s face goes red. “It’s really not as big as it looks once you get used to it,” he says.

“She fucks you with that?” Todd says incredulously.

“What did you think she did with it?” Jenny asks.

Todd makes a strangled sort of sound, but he doesn’t look upset.

God, Hannah prays that Todd will let her use it on him tonight.

She pulls the strap-on out of the box and then—okay, she has to take her panties off for this part. It’s a double-ended strap-on, because there was no way she was going to let Curtis get all the fun from this thing, which means she can’t just put it on over her underwear. Curtis had, of course, seen her naked plenty of time before she ever bought the strap-on, so that wasn’t really a concern.

But now—sure, they’re all mostly naked, they’ve kissed, most combinations of them have done _more_ than kiss at some point or another, but—they’re all still in their underwear, and Hannah doesn’t know if she wants to be the first one to take the plunge.

She is the one who went and got her strap-on from her room, though, so clearly she’s already taking some kind of charge here.

So she takes a deep breath, ignores how red she can feel her face going, and goes for it. She pulls off her panties, swallows down any embarrassment, and looks up to see her three best friends in the world looking at her with a sort of _reverence._

That’s all the confidence-boosting she needs.

So she pulls off her bra, too—might as well go all the way—and picks up the strap-on.

“Wait,” Jenny says, and Hannah freezes. She thought this was good. Is she going too fast? Does Jenny not want— “Let me help.”

Hannah’s eyes widen as she watches Jenny take the strap-on from her with one hand. In the other hand, she’s grabbed the bottle of cherry-flavoured lube that she and Curtis keep in their sex toy box.

It’s an absolutely mesmerizing experience, watching Jenny’s beautiful, long-fingered hands wrap themselves around the smaller end of the strap-on, slicking it up for Hannah. Her breath catches in her throat at the sight of it. She’s completely lost track of what Curtis and Todd are up to. All that matters right now is Jenny, and Jenny’s hands, and—

“Ready?” Jenny asks, and her voice is low and sultry and _exactly_ what Hannah imagined whenever she had Curtis under her and he was calling Todd’s name.

“ _Yes_ ,” Hannah breathes.

She lies back—they’re on the basement floor, and maybe that should be embarrassing, degrading, but really it’s the only place Hannah can think of where all four of them would comfortably fit. Besides, the carpet is clean and soft—she likes to vacuum, okay?—and really, in this moment, Hannah couldn’t care less where they’re doing this. They’re _doing this_ , and the longer this goes on, the more Hannah realizes how much she has wanted _this_ , exactly this.

She gasps when Jenny’s beautiful hands touch her. It’s a gentle touch, softly spreading Hannah’s folds as she lines up the toy. Jenny’s hands are so different from Curtis’s, and the difference is fascinating. Hannah wants Todd’s hands on her, too—the scientist in her wants to compare and analyze every difference between them.

Jenny pushes the slicked up toy in gently, carefully, and the gradual feeling of fullness is _perfect._ She almost wants Jenny to go faster, harder, but she appreciates how careful Jenny is being with her—Jenny has never struck her as the careful, gentle type, and the surprise is delightful.

She gasps again once the toy is fully seated.

“How’s that?” Jenny asks, leaning forward so her lips are inches from Hannah’s mouth.

“ _Perfect,_ ” Hannah whispers, and then they’re kissing again, soft and perfect. And then Jenny starts to move the toy inside of Hannah, a gentle rocking, and Hannah feels like she could explode.

Whatever Todd and Curtis were doing, they seem to have decided that they don’t want to be left out any longer, because Hannah suddenly feels a body pressed up behind her. She recognizes the feel of Curtis’s body, and the touch of his hands—one warm, one cold—on her shoulders, supporting her so she doesn’t have to lift herself up on her elbows to kiss Jenny.

She leans back into Curtis’s hold, feeling so beautifully held. It’s almost overwhelming, but in the most wonderful way.

Hannah cracks her eyes open, just slightly, and she sees Todd leaning over her, kissing Curtis over her shoulder.

Maybe it’s the sight of them kissing, or maybe Jenny hits her just right, or maybe it’s just _everything_ about this moment—but whatever it is, Hannah feels herself coming. She moans into Jenny’s mouth, and she doesn’t care if she’s being loud, doesn’t care if everyone knows she just came.

She _wants_ them to know. She wants them to know how good they’re being for her, how much she loves this.

“ _Jenny,_ ” Hannah moans, at the same time that Curtis whispers, “ _Todd_.”

Todd pulls away suddenly, and Hannah looks up to see Curtis’s face absolutely _flaming_ red.

“Dude,” Todd says.

“I meant like… Hannah… Todd…” Curtis splutters.

“You’re literally making out with him, babe,” Jenny says. “You’re really going to complain about him saying your _name?_ ”

Jenny’s still pressing herself down against Hannah, her hand on the toy, but she’s stopped moving it for a moment and she’s giving Todd an exasperated look that wouldn’t be out of place in a Book Meeting. Hannah almost wants to laugh at how this moment should be so _different_ from every other time the four of them have hung out, and yet it’s so, so similar.

“It’s just weird!” Todd whines, then turns to Curtis and off-handedly says, “No offense, dude.”

Curtis shrugs, still red-faced but apparently not very phased. Curtis is probably more used to this version of Todd than Hannah gave him credit for. Curtis did say that he has both kissed Todd and jerked him off before, and he still thinks the guy is straight, so maybe this is just normal for them.

As long as Curtis seems okay, Hannah doesn’t really care if Todd is being weird about any of this. What she _really_ cares about is chasing the high of her orgasm again, because she isn’t close to being done.

She bucks her hips slightly, drawing Jenny’s attention back to her. “Jenny,” she says, hoping her voice is doing it for Jenny as much as Jenny’s voice did it for her. “Want me to return the favour?”

She actually _sees_ Jenny swallow, and that’s _so_ satisfying.

“ _Yeah_ ,” Jenny says.

“Hey,” Todd says. “Is this just going to be the Hannah-and-Jenny night?”

Jenny raises her eyebrows. “I thought you were excited about _girl makeouts_ , Todd.”

“I mean… I _am_ , but…”

Jenny laughs. “Don’t worry, babe.” She leans forward to caress the side of Todd’s face, and the way he leans into her touch is absolutely adorable. “Hannah can do you next.”

Todd’s eyes widen, but he doesn’t actually protest.

“She’s really, _really_ good, dude,” Curtis says, and Hannah preens a little at his praise.

“I don’t know, man,” Todd says. “I don’t know if I want anyone sticking anything up there.”

“Don’t knock it til you try it,” Jenny says.

“How would you know?” Todd counters.

Jenny snorts. “Just because _we’ve_ never done it doesn’t mean _I’ve_ never done it.”

Now Todd’s eyes are huge. “You’ve done _butt stuff?_ ”

Jenny laughs, and it’s a stupid conversation, but it doesn’t matter—Jenny’s laugh is so pretty, and Hannah’s heart squeezes in her chest at the sight of her.

She wants to make Jenny laugh, and she wants to make her gasp, and she wants to make her _scream_.

She sits up, pulling away from Curtis slightly. And then she turns her head and gives Curtis a quick kiss, because she might be head over heels for Jenny and Todd right now, but she doesn’t want Curtis to think that she’s forgotten about him.

“You good with all this, sweetie?” Curtis whispers as she pulls away.

“I’m _amazing_ with this,” she says. “You?”

For a second she’s worried that he’s _not_ okay with this, but then he gives her the cutest lopsided grin and says, “Yeah. _Amazing._ ”

She grins back, gives him another quick peck, and then turns back to Jenny.

“Let me make you feel good, Jenny,” she says. “While Todd makes up his mind.”

Jenny looks kind of amused, but Hannah is way past the point of embarrassment now. She’s on all fours, and Jenny leans back, letting Hannah crawl over until she’s straddling her. She leans down and kisses Jenny _hard_. For a second she wonders if it’s too hard—maybe Jenny wants things soft and gentle, the way she was treating Hannah—but when Hannah pulls away, the look on Jenny’s face says that she _absolutely_ wants it a little harder, a little rougher.

Hannah leans down and kisses her again, _harder_ , and pushes her down into the carpet. She has one hand bracing herself against the carpet beside Jenny’s head, and she reaches down with the other hand to pull Jenny’s panties down and line up the strap-on with Jenny’s opening.

Then she pauses, realizing that Jenny only slicked up one side of the strap-on, and this side is still dry.

“Mm, Curtis,” Hannah says. “Grab the lube?”

“Don’t need it,” Jenny breathes. “I’m already wet enough, babe.”

Hannah’s heart skips a beat when she realizes that Jenny is calling _her_ babe.

“Don’t want to risk it,” Hannah says. “I want this to be good for you, sweetie.”

If Jenny thinks that _sweetie_ is too cheesy, she doesn’t show it. She swallows hard again, and Hannah leans back to make room for Curtis to reach down between them with one slicked-up hand and start working the lube onto the black plastic cock.

She’s glad Curtis knows what she wants without her having to tell him—the sight of this, Curtis slicking up her cock while she’s still straddling Jenny’s thighs, Jenny lying back on the carpet, her hair splayed out around her head like a halo… It’s perfect.

Hannah glances over at Todd, who’s kneeling beside them, just _watching_. He doesn’t seem to know what to do with himself, and Hannah takes pity on him.

“Help him out, Todd,” she says, nodding at Curtis.

Todd swallows, and it’s so similar to Jenny’s swallow that it’s cute.

And then Todd crawls over, presses his body up next to Curtis’s, and then they’re _both_ working their hands over her slick cock, cherry-flavoured lube dripping down their fingers and onto Jenny’s smooth thighs.

Hannah is dizzy with the high of it.

Jenny’s pupils are blown wide, too, and when the boys finally pull away, she’s looking at Hannah with what can only be described as _hunger_ in her eyes.

Hannah leans forward and presses her lips to the shell of Jenny’s ear. “Ready?” she whispers.

“ _Yes_ ,” Jenny breathes.

Hannah nips at Jenny’s earlobe lightly, and Jenny gasps, and then Hannah is reaching down and lining herself up with Jenny’s opening again.

She’s never done this with someone who has a vagina—she’s _very_ used to doing this with Curtis, but she doesn’t have to prep Jenny the way she preps Curtis. Jenny’s hole is wet and pliant and _hungry_ , and Hannah wishes she could _feel_ her cock sinking into that warmth.

The way Jenny _reacts_ is just as sweet, though. Jenny _writhes_ under her, and as Hannah works up her pace, she can feel the end of the strap-on that’s inside of her pressing back with every thrust.

“ _Jenny_ ,” she moans, and it feels like every time she ever called Curtis _Jenny_ it was practice for this, for this moment, and it’s so, so sweet.

And then, beside her, she hears Curtis moan, “ _Todd_ …” again. Todd doesn’t complain this time, though, and Hannah looks up from Jenny’s face long enough to see that Todd is absolutely, one hundred percent going down on Curtis. Hannah has no idea how this happened, but she’s not complaining.

The sight of Todd’s soft lips stretched obscenely around Curtis’s thick cock is almost enough to send Hannah over the edge again. She pounds harder into Jenny, gripping her hips with the bruising strength that always seems to come with her Todd persona.

Jenny throws her head back and her back _arches_ off the floor, and Hannah can not only see but _feel_ the moment that Jenny comes, and shouts, “Ah! _Todd!_ ”

Todd jerks slightly at the sound of his name, but he still has his mouth around Curtis’s length, and Curtis has the fingers of his metal hand tangled into Todd’s hair in a way that’s bound to be painful eventually, but Todd seems to be enjoying it right now.

And Hannah—Hannah doesn’t just _come_ when Jenny calls Todd’s name. She comes so hard her breath catches in her throat and she thinks she might pass out from how _good_ this all is. Because Jenny isn’t calling for Todd, not really. _Hannah_ made her shout like that, and it feels so _good_ and so _right_ that Hannah doesn’t even _care_ if it’s the so-called _evil_ part of her that loves this so much—after everything that’s happened to them, Hannah thinks this is the closest she’s ever gotten to thinking _I could die, right here, right now, and I’d be happy._

But she’s not planning on dying any time soon—not even Book Stuff could ruin tonight. She still needs to see if she can convince Todd to let her use the strap-on on him. And maybe, if she’s lucky, Jenny will use the strap-on on _her._

Maybe she can convince Curtis to break out the lingerie, too. She thinks Jenny would like that. She thinks Todd might _really_ like that.

Maybe, maybe, maybe—there are so many ways this night can go, and Hannah is unreasonably excited about all of them.

And, more than that, she’s excited about the future. Because this isn’t a one time thing, not if Hannah has anything to say about it. She and Curtis have been fucking with Jenny and Todd’s names on their tongues for weeks now—really, she realizes now, it was only a matter of time before they started fucking with Jenny and Todd _themselves_ on their tongues, and there’s no way Hannah is going to give this up now that she has it.


End file.
